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Written for National Sibling Day.
Simon lifted the lid of the bread box, stuck his hand inside, and grinned.
"Mars, wait, there's something in here," he said. Marshall, who had been about to slip out the Holmes's badly-hung screen door in order to raid his own parents' kitchen, froze.
"Is it... edible?" he ventured.
Simon pulled out a torn cellophane wrapping, the cloudy interior of which revealed three slightly shrivelled bagels. He looked doubtful. At his side, Harley stood on tip-toe in order to get a better look at the dangling sack of maybe-food.
Setting the bag gently down on a cluttered worktop encrusted with long-dried stains of various origins, he pulled the sticky sheets of plastic apart and examined his find at close quarters.
"No visible mould spots," he said, and risked an experimental sniff. "Doesn't smell bad. Or smell at all, really."
He picked one up and frowned, then brought it down sharply against the edge of the counter. A loud thunk echoed through the small room, and a chip of Formica the size of a man's thumbnail flew off and ricocheted off the 1987 inspirational kitten calendar that hung on the wall behind Marshall's ear. He ducked, and Harley clapped, whether at the speed of Marshall's reflexes when it came to avoiding ambulatory baked goods or just in appreciation for a close call with a bread-related bodily injury.
"Oh," said Simon. He looked crushed.
"Don't worry about it," said Marshall. "My mom brought home a whole bunch of tiny sandwiches left over from the Mayor's fundraiser last night. I'm ninety percent sure that since she catered it, we can eat them without binding our souls to Chisel's re-election campaign. I'll go find a backpack or something to put them in and be right back."
"Okay," said Simon. "Sorry, Mars."
Marshall almost asked why, but stopped himself.
"We can take the bagels with us," he said. "Harley can feed it to the ducks or something, keep him occupied."
The shadows at Simon's back darkened for a moment as Harley scowled.
Simon, unaware, tapped one finger against the nearest bagel. It made a sound like he was flicking a large ceramic bowl.
"I don't think these are safe to eat even for the Deadwood Park water birds," he said. "I think it might kill them."
Harley brightened. So too did Marshall.
"You think so?" he said, his tone studiedly careless. "I think that white duck can eat almost anything."
Simon shook his head.
"It's rock hard, Mars," he said. "If you threw it too hard you could do real damage."
"Oh," said Marshall. "Shame."
As Simon turned to the untidy tangle of hand-me-down coats crowding the kitchen table, searching out the least-holey, best-fitting offerings from a sea of bad choices, Marshall watched without speaking as Harley finagled first one, then two, then three of the ballistic bagels free of the wrapping.
As he secreted them away beneath his jumper, Marshall realised that this practised stealth probably explained where all the white fudge chip cookies his mom would bake in order to bribe him into babysitting always ended up.
Harley caught his gaze, and nodded.
"Swan," he mouthed, his teeth white and bright and very sharp.
"Duck," Marshall whispered back.
Holmes Brothers
The End by
froodle, in which Simon reads Harley a bedtime story
Drains by
froodle, in which clowns are evil, murderous sacks of shit, and Simon is having none of it
Kaleidoscope by
froodle, in which Simon has cause to regret buying cheap toys at the World o' Stuff
Sneakers by
froodle, in which the latest Sky Monsters are released
Reception by
froodle, in which Simon has problems with his mobile phone
Festival by
froodle, in which Eerie's local businesses celebrate the summer
Strawberry by
froodle, in which there is unauthorised hubbub in Eerie
Anticipation by
froodle, in which Simon and Harley look forward to the Equinox
The Hut by
froodle, in which Simon takes on the forces of Eerie solo
Trusted Associates, Inc.
Halloween by
froodle, in which Mars and Simon celebrate a Von Orloff-free All Hallows Eve
Surprise by
froodle, in which Mars tries to make sure Simon's birthday goes a little better this year
The Glade by
froodle, in which Simon and Mars visit a place that only exists on February 29th
Egg Hunt by
froodle, in which Simon and Mars partake of some traditional Easter activities
Boardwalk by
froodle, in which Simon and Mars are swayed by radio advertising
Lady in Red by
froodle, in which Simon experiments on the old-fashioned radio in the Secret Spot, and horror ensues
Waiting In by
froodle, in which there is an ice-storm and a handyman does not arrive
Seafoam by
froodle, in which Simon and Marshall go to the seaside
A Night at the Circus by
froodle, in which a carnivale comes to town, and Marshall and Simon do not enjoy themselves
Taking a Break by
froodle, in which Simon and Marshall enjoy some much-needed R&R
Model Railway by
froodle, in which a new business prepares to open in Eerie
Shoreline by
froodle, in which Simon and Marshall investigate strange happenings on the shores of Lake Eerie
Parade by
froodle, in which Mars takes issue with the Eerie Beekeepers Association's choice of mascot
Homestead by
froodle, in which Marshall finally gets something useful out of shop class
Hound by
froodle, in which Simon makes a friend
Errands by
froodle, in which Simon has a to-do list
Slyboots by
froodle, in which a certain corporal of the infernal regions comes to Eerie. Crossover with Johannes Cabal the Necromancer.
Waterlogged by
froodle, in which Eerie experiences heavy rainfall
Festival by
froodle, in which Eerie's local businesses celebrate the summer
Strawberry by
froodle, in which there is unauthorised hubbub in Eerie
Wildlife by
froodle, in which Simon and Marshall go to the beach
Facilities by
froodle, in which the Eerie Bus Station and Supper Club has a problem with the men's toilet
Anticipation by
froodle, in which Simon and Harley look forward to the Equinox
Castle by
froodle, in which there is unexpected architecture in Eerie
Visitor in which Marshall's grandma comes to stay
Euclid by
froodle, in which Marshall and Simon investigate strange events at the Eerie Cemetery
The Hut by
froodle, in which Simon takes on the forces of Eerie solo
Simon lifted the lid of the bread box, stuck his hand inside, and grinned.
"Mars, wait, there's something in here," he said. Marshall, who had been about to slip out the Holmes's badly-hung screen door in order to raid his own parents' kitchen, froze.
"Is it... edible?" he ventured.
Simon pulled out a torn cellophane wrapping, the cloudy interior of which revealed three slightly shrivelled bagels. He looked doubtful. At his side, Harley stood on tip-toe in order to get a better look at the dangling sack of maybe-food.
Setting the bag gently down on a cluttered worktop encrusted with long-dried stains of various origins, he pulled the sticky sheets of plastic apart and examined his find at close quarters.
"No visible mould spots," he said, and risked an experimental sniff. "Doesn't smell bad. Or smell at all, really."
He picked one up and frowned, then brought it down sharply against the edge of the counter. A loud thunk echoed through the small room, and a chip of Formica the size of a man's thumbnail flew off and ricocheted off the 1987 inspirational kitten calendar that hung on the wall behind Marshall's ear. He ducked, and Harley clapped, whether at the speed of Marshall's reflexes when it came to avoiding ambulatory baked goods or just in appreciation for a close call with a bread-related bodily injury.
"Oh," said Simon. He looked crushed.
"Don't worry about it," said Marshall. "My mom brought home a whole bunch of tiny sandwiches left over from the Mayor's fundraiser last night. I'm ninety percent sure that since she catered it, we can eat them without binding our souls to Chisel's re-election campaign. I'll go find a backpack or something to put them in and be right back."
"Okay," said Simon. "Sorry, Mars."
Marshall almost asked why, but stopped himself.
"We can take the bagels with us," he said. "Harley can feed it to the ducks or something, keep him occupied."
The shadows at Simon's back darkened for a moment as Harley scowled.
Simon, unaware, tapped one finger against the nearest bagel. It made a sound like he was flicking a large ceramic bowl.
"I don't think these are safe to eat even for the Deadwood Park water birds," he said. "I think it might kill them."
Harley brightened. So too did Marshall.
"You think so?" he said, his tone studiedly careless. "I think that white duck can eat almost anything."
Simon shook his head.
"It's rock hard, Mars," he said. "If you threw it too hard you could do real damage."
"Oh," said Marshall. "Shame."
As Simon turned to the untidy tangle of hand-me-down coats crowding the kitchen table, searching out the least-holey, best-fitting offerings from a sea of bad choices, Marshall watched without speaking as Harley finagled first one, then two, then three of the ballistic bagels free of the wrapping.
As he secreted them away beneath his jumper, Marshall realised that this practised stealth probably explained where all the white fudge chip cookies his mom would bake in order to bribe him into babysitting always ended up.
Harley caught his gaze, and nodded.
"Swan," he mouthed, his teeth white and bright and very sharp.
"Duck," Marshall whispered back.
Holmes Brothers
The End by
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Drains by
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Kaleidoscope by
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Sneakers by
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Reception by
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Festival by
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Strawberry by
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Anticipation by
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The Hut by
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Trusted Associates, Inc.
Halloween by
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Surprise by
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The Glade by
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Egg Hunt by
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Boardwalk by
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Lady in Red by
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Waiting In by
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Seafoam by
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A Night at the Circus by
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Taking a Break by
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Model Railway by
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Shoreline by
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Parade by
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Homestead by
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Hound by
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Errands by
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Slyboots by
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Waterlogged by
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Festival by
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Strawberry by
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Wildlife by
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Facilities by
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Anticipation by
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Castle by
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Visitor in which Marshall's grandma comes to stay
Euclid by
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The Hut by
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