Eerie, Indiana fanfiction: The Toll

[froodle]

"Beep, beep, beep!" Edgar Teller intoned, nudging open the bedroom door with the toes of one bare foot. Within the gloomy interior, something moved. The window was a pale outline of watery blue where the early morning sun seeped in around the curtains, providing just enough light to illuminate the tightly-rolled cocoon of bedsheets and eiderdown occupying the exact centre of the mattress.

Edgar sat on the edge of the bed, nudging the blanket burrito with one hip in an effort to give himself more room. A single baleful eye peeped from behind a mass of dark curls, and he proffered up the large cardboard box in his arms for inspection.

"Beep, beep!" he said, his voice robotic. "Bedroom delivery! This package requires a kiss! Beep, beep! Bedroom delivery! This package requires a kiss!"

"Mrawgh," said Marilyn, freeing one hand from the swaddling of duvets and holding it out, palm up.

"Nope," said Edgar, pulling the box back out of reach. "There is a kiss toll to pay on this package. Fifteen kisses, please." He pursed his lips expectantly, his eyes closed, making cartoonish kissing sounds as he did so.

"Okay," said Marilyn, rolling over in attempt to squirm loose of the covers. After a few seconds of wriggling, both arms were out and she was able to lever herself up into a sitting position.

"Beep, beep!" said Edgar, giving the box a gentle shake. "There is a kiss fine for kiss delays! Now your kiss debt is up to twenty! Don't delay, kisses today!"

Marilyn laughed, shuffling towards him, her lower half still swathed in a tangle of fabric. Edgar, his eyes still closed, felt the mattress shift beneath him and leaned forward.

"Ahah!" screamed Marilyn, seizing the package and rolling towards the far side of the bed in one quick motion, clutching the box to her naked chest. "Unexpected!"

"No!" shouted Edgar. "The kiss covenant has been broken! Beep, beep! Emergency kiss measures, deploy!"

He launched himself at his wife, who shrieked and squealed as he began tickling her exposed skin.

Downstairs, Syndi and Marshall stared at each other over the breakfast table.

"You know the worst part?" asked Syndi.

"You mean, apart from all of it?" said Marshall.

"I saw the shipping label on that box when Dad was signing for it," said Syndi. "It's not sexy underwear or marital aids or dirty pictures or anything. It's a bunch of yellow and green bunting for the Shuckers Bowlathon next month. This is all just... them."

Marshall dropped his spoon into his cereal bowl with a splash and the clink of metal on ceramic.

"I was planning on going to that," he said. "I think I've changed my mind."

Syndi grimaced sympathetically.





Teller Family History

First Date by froodle, in which a young Edgar Teller shows off one of his earlier inventions

Popcorn by froodle. Friday night is always movie night in the Teller household.

The Teller Home for Displaced Youth by froodle, in which Edgar harbours some doubts about his new home town

Lawn by froodle, in which Marilyn Teller contemplaces some yardwork

Tornado Day, Revisited by froodle, in which Syndi learns exactly what it means to be Miss Tornado Day

Wildlife by froodle, in which Simon and Marshall go to the beach

Culinary Delights by froodle, in which Syndi's terrible cooking may or may not have been an accident

Camping by froodle, in which Syndi cannot sleep

Artist in the Family by froodle, in which an immortal creature takes a liking to Syndi

Without Due Care and Attention by froodle, in which Syndi finally becomes mobile

Waiting In by froodle, in which there is an ice-storm and a handyman does not arrive

Brunch by froodle, in which Marilyn does not appreciate Edgar's help in the kitchen

Handmade by froodle, in which the Tellers receive a Christmas package from Marilyn's mother

Poor Life Choices by froodle, in which Syndi loves her brother anyway

Lillian by froodle, in which Marilyn's mother has concerns

Visitor by froodle, in which Marshall's grandma comes to stay

Nap by froodle, in which Marshall has a quiet moment in the Secret Spot

Fresh Sheets by froodle

Tradition by froodle, in which Dash and Marshall decorate a Christmas tree

Hometown by froodle, in which Mars and Syndi visit New Jersey

Comments

[evilinsanemonkey]

Marilyn and Edgar are adorable!!

and their kids are like NOOOOOOOOOOOO STOPPPP

[froodle]

Mars and Syndi are right now getting in the car and roadtripping to gravity falls to get the mind eraser. And Marilyn and Edgar are like it doesn't matter kids, WE'LL STILL BE LIKE THIS WHEN YOU GET BACK!!

[deifire]

Marilyn and Edgar!!! I will never get tired of them being sickeningly cute! Or the reactions of their poor offspring!

This is so hilarious and adorable I'm probably going to be smiling about it all day <3

[froodle]

Yay! Fluffy domestic elder tellers for the win!