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[personal profile] froodle
Simon thanked the person on the other end of the line, settling the phone down gently in it's receiver before turning to Marshall.

"Good news and bad news," he said.

"Go on," said Marshall, inwardly bracing himself. Sometimes even Simon's good news could contain a fair amount of bad.

"Sparky only counts as one enrolment- he's got three heads but only one stomach, so feeding and clean-up is about the same as for any large dog."

"But?"

"Since the Wild Hunt's hounds aren't always or even mostly confined to dog shape, Mustard's technically a polymorph so they won't take him."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Simon looked at the online registration form open in front of him, then down at the two creatures that sat at his feet and that were, for the most part, dogs.

"Hmm," he said, looking back at the screen.

"What's up?" asked Marshall, navigating the small menagerie while holding two cups of coffee with the ease of long practise. "Pup Patrol Doggy Daycare won't take them?"

"I haven't finished filling out the application forms yet," said Simon, taking one of the mugs with a grateful smile. "Does Sparky count as one or three, do you think?"

"Call them and ask."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
"Come on," Simon coaxed. "Just one more."

At his feet, a great black Hellhound whimpered and writhed, it's central head held in place by the pressure of Simon's knees on either side of his muzzle. Eight red eyes, crusted with yellowish phlegm, rolled and blinked and watered as Simon raised the pipette in preparation for the final dose.

"It's almost over," he soothed, reaching out his free hand and scratching as far up the thick trifurcated neck as he could reach. "And after this, no more trying to read the signs outside of churches, okay?"

Sparky barked his mournful agreement.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
It was obvious from Simon's expression that he'd somewhat missed his mark.

"It's nothing infernal," Simon hastened to explain. "It's just... you know how Boris Von Orloff got a job on that old radio we brought from the Secret Spot?"

Marshall nodded. While the self-proclaimed star of stage and screen had proved somewhat obnoxious during his impromptu visit to Eerie, it hadn't lessened Marshall's enjoyment of his movies nor, post-resurrection, his voice work.

Simon's gaze flicked to the Hellhound, currently asleep in a slightly-scorched basket made of packing crates.

"I think he's too young for ghost stories," he told Marshall.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Simon's face was pale and the dark shadows under his eyes would have made attractive hiding places for any number of lurking things. Marshall took the seat opposite him, careful to avoid any scraping of the chair's metal legs against the tatty linoleum flooring as he did so.

"Hey," he said softly. "You doing okay?"

Simon passed one hand over pallid skin, utterly failing to restore any life to it.

"I'm okay," he said. "Tired, is all. Sparky's being having bad dreams."

Marshall felt himself blanch and hid it with a sip of coffee.

"Oh?" he said, aiming for nonchalance.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
The sound of sausages hissing in the heavy cast-iron pan drifted out through the hairline crack in the almost-closed kitchen door, accompanied by the savoury aroma of fried grease and onions.

In the living room, a great Hellhound sat inside a circle of salt, commanded to stay and none too happy about it.

Dash, who had been similarly banished, could sympathise.

"What do you say?" he asked the massive three-headed beast. "I break the salt-line, you rush in there and distract him, and I raid the fridge while you do it?"

Sparky's three heads drooled, and his eyes shone red.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Marshall picked up the blue-grey plaid dressing gown from where he'd flung it over the back of the sofa and pulled it on.

As usual, the belt was missing, and he glanced behind the settee and on the floor around him to see where it had gone.

When it didn't show up, he sighed in resignation and pulled the two halves of the thick and fleecy material around him as best he could.

"I don't know why Lodgepoole bothers," he said, pouring himself a coffee and settling onto the couch.

"It's not Lodgepoole," said Simon. "Sparky's been chewing them."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
"Good boys," Simon cooed, reaching up to scratch Sparky's centre chin with one hand while simultaneously reaching down to rub Mustard's ears with the other. "Daddy's very good babies, yes!"

He gave Sparky's collar a tug, bringing the gigantic Cerberus to sit at his feet, then produced a much-chewed rubber ball from his pocket.

"Watch this," he told Marshall, then turned back to his pets.

"Sparky, stay. Mustard," he hurled the ball as far as he could across the wet grass, "Go fetch!"

To Marshall, it looked for one horrifying moment as if Mustard had exploded. Teeth and fur and limbs were suddenly spread over the ground in front of him, two, three dozen legs writhing and churning as long black nails tore clumps of wet soil as they sped away. Drool-smeared lips peeled back from a hundred pairs of long jaws and a thousand yellow-white teeth snapped around snarls from an infinity of throats.

He stumbled back, hands raised to ward off the scene unfolding before him, and the enormous serpentine shape that had been Mustard flung itself away, vanishing across the park in a stomach-churning roil of sinewy muscle.

A few seconds later, Mustard trotted back into view, a battered rubber ball clutched in his single, normal-sized pair of jaws, a smile on his single, normal-sized doggy face.

He bounded over to them, plumed tail wagging, yellow-gold coat streaked with nothing more than earth and grass, and deposited the toy at Marshall's feet.

"I think the King probably breeds them himself," Simon said.

Marshall nodded weakly, then knelt to pick up the ball. Mustard barked, leaping about in excitement as he prepared to play fetch.

"I guess this is why you always come to the park so early," he said.

"Yeah," said Simon. "It's nice and quiet now."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Marshall nodded thoughtfully. Simon stood up and stretched.

"Besides," he said. "Just because Mustard looks like this now, doesn't mean he looks like this always."

He glanced around, making sure they were alone, then produced a rib-bone carved with indentations like the holes in a flute and blew on it.

At once, Sparky abandoned what he was doing and came trotting over, three pink tongues dangling from three canine heads while his writhing coat of vipers tucked their own tongues neatly away.

As always, Mustard followed, small yellow paws stepping into the great depressions left by the Hellhound's huge feet.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
"Oh," said Simon. "I guess that's just how he likes to look. I don't know that he was ever even part of the Chase."

Marshall's brow furrowed.

"So he's just a regular dog?" he asked. "I guess I thought that the Wild Hunt bred their hounds specifically and Mustard was just kind of an outlier, but now I don't know. Is the King recruiting out of our world's pounds and petshops and stuff?"

"I think even the Wild Hunt wouldn't dare poach from Fifi's talent pool," said Simon. "Which is good, because otherwise his hounds would be a lot crueller."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: CAT

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[personal profile] froodle
"You know what I don't get?" said Marshall, both hands cupped around his cocoa as the glorious warmth permeated his chilled fingers.

Simon shook his head, his eyes not leaving the two dogs as they rummaged amongst the tangle of bracken at the base of an old and very cursed oak tree.

"No," he said. "What?"

"Why does Mustard look like that?" As Simon turned to look at him, Marshall unpeeled a single digit away from his drink to indicate the smaller, paler animal.

"He's a Hound of the Wild Hunt. Why does he look just like a Golden Retriever?"

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Marshall shifted on the park bench, the metal slats cold even through layers of clothing. At his side, Simon filled a small plastic mug from an insulated flask, filling the air with the rich scent of cocoa and sending plumes of steam wafting into the damp air of an unseasonably cold spring morning.

A little way ahead of them, two shapes moved in the undergrowth. One vast and black, setting off bursts of hissing fog wherever hellfire-hot fur brushed against the dew-soaked branches, the other smaller and yellow-blond, sticking close to the first one's side like a pale, nervous shadow.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Farmer Chambers nodded gravely.

"That'll do it," he said. "The lake keeps what it has, and doesn't take kindly to those that'd take from it."

"Yeah, she's pretty mad," said Simon, watching the block of latex soften and deform over the warmth of Hellfire. "The Baitshop's had to switch to eat-in or takeout only, and apparently they've gotten some bad reviews over it."

Ephraim whistled.

"You'd think folks would learn, after that food critic washed up last summer with tentacles in all the places a man shouldn't have them."

Simon shivered, pushing that image aside to focus on his work.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: Janet

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[personal profile] froodle
Simon nodded, his hands already deep inside his field kit as he retrieved blocks of latex, a set of smallish glass beakers, and a single eternally-burning tear from a Hellhound's eye.

(He'd harvested it from Sparky one night when Marshall had refused to feed him a second French stick of garlic bread, on the basis that the first had probably been a bad idea to begin with. He'd been right, but it hadn't stopped their dog from turning on the waterworks).

"Janet has been giving them hell lately," he said. "Apparently the clowns ate one of her delivery drivers, so..."

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: Janet

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[personal profile] froodle
Simon's own office chair was occupied by a bulging manila folder, a half-empty box of Hellhound Yum-Yum Jackalope Chews - these claimed to neutralise doggy damnation breath; this claim was not accurate - and an eternally screaming, squirming thing upon which the sigil of sulphur glowed white hot.

It had been a gift from Harley. Simon thought it might be a coaster, or possibly a mouse-pad.

He stood awkwardly behind his desk and smiled at Manual.

"How can I help?"

Manual jammed his shovel-like hand into the breast pocket of his polyester button-down and pulled out a torn page from a catalogue.

Ongoing Verse: Holmes Brothers

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Ongoing Verse: Trusted Associates Inc

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[personal profile] froodle
The afternoon sun shone through the empty spaces in the car park across the street and cast a single patch of warm gold on the cheap and faded living room carpet.

The manticore flopped bonelessly down in the sunbeam, belly up and paws splayed. It furled and unfurled it's wings, angling them carefully to ensure every drop of light would be captured.

"Hey," said Simon, nudging it with his bare foot. "Move up. Share with your brother."

He gestured to the hulking three-headed Hellhound that pressed against his legs, three mouths turned down in a reproachful pout.

The manticore chuckled.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
"In this house dwells a beast with three heads, twelve eyes and a coat of black vipers," said the King. "Liquid darkness oozes beneath your doors, smelling of maple syrup. The Anti-Christ walks freely here, though every door in the place is warded. And a man who was a boy built of spare parts and malice has fallen asleep on the sofa, even though he was supposed to be doing the washing up."

"Oh, for-" Marshall started to turn back, then froze. "What?"

"What indeed," said the King. "So many strange things live here. And yet, my hounds are weird?"

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: Holmes Brothers

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[personal profile] froodle
"I call him Big Moo," said Farmer Chambers, patting the enormous cloud-buffalo on the muzzle.

Simon walked a slow circle around the massive animal, taking in the thick mane comprised of thousands of tightly-clustered balloons.

"He's very pretty," he said, holding out one hand for Big Moo to sniff.

"The only cloud-bison in the entire state of Indiana," the farmer declared proudly, as Big Moo licked Simon's hand with enough enthusiasm to earn a glare from Sparky. "Look at that coat. You could make balloon arches for a dozen weddings and still have some left over."

Big Moo moo'd, loudly.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: The Powers That Be

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[personal profile] froodle
"This isn't fair!" whined the headless ghost, which should have been impossible for a couple of reasons.

It pointed one spectral finger at Sparky, who continued to pant in happy ignorance of the conflict transpiring around him.

"He's got three heads!" the ghost said. "I don't even have one! He can spare me a single measly skull."

Phantom blood continued to pump gorily from the ragged stump of the ghost's neck as it spoke.

"You're being really selfish!"

"That's..." Simon searched for words and found them wanting.

"The last decapitation victim was a lot nicer than you," he said instead.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Simon stared in horror at the saliva-smeared human head clutched in one set of his pet Hellhound's massive jaws.

"Sparky," he said, his voice halfway between a whisper and a scream. "What did you do?"

"He's pulled me away from a nice quiet evening of haunting the covered bridge," said the head, still dapper beneath the layer of drool. "Those Ouija-wielding teens won't get the scare they deserve, and will likely come to a bad end when they keep pushing their luck the spirit world."

Simon, who suspected he knew at least one of the teens in question, secretly agreed.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
The crocodile's two other heads had been constructed of old newspaper and glue, and they were already melting in the rain. This didn't seem to bother the single real head, which was happily sunning itself on a log, completely independent from it's apparently still-alive body.

Sparky looked down at Simon. Simon looked up at Sparky.

The crocodile's body continued to swim lazy circles around the small ornamental pond, where the goose with a serious face watched it with disapproving, serious eyes.

"Uh," said Simon. "This is... not what I expected."

He ran one hand though his hair.

The crocodile grinned.


Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
Sparky's thick black fur was sodden, soaked passed the point where the Hellhound's internal infernal flames could keep it dry. He was also covered in wet sand and shale and would need to be sprayed with the garden hose once they got home.

None of that bothered Simon. That was all part and parcel of taking a dog to the lake, regardless of whether the dog had one head or three, if it pledged allegiance to Satan or worshipped at the altar of Winnalot Wet Foods.

The mermaid tail dangling from one of his mouths was a different question, however.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
The air from the Pit was hot and fetid, and the light was a blood-tinged orange as Marshall opened one reluctant eye. Beneath the hiss and crackle of the flames, he could hear the far-off screaming of souls in torment, and above all, the steady, insistent panting of the dog nuzzling his face.

"Sparky, down," he mumbled, reaching up both hands and gently pushing the gaping maw closed. The sights, sounds and smells of Hell cut off abruptly, and he sat up in bed, staring into twelve worried red eyes.

He checked the clock, groaned when he saw it was a little past four in the morning. The empty space beside him on the mattress was cold and light oozed beneath the bedroom door. He closed his eyes, buried his face in black fur that smelled of woodsmoke and the screaming void that waits at the limits of eternity.

His eyes snapped open again.

"Sparky," he said. "What are you doing in here?"

The Hellhound looked to the door, then back again. He whimpered, six ears flat against three skulls.

"Okay," said Marshall, reaching for a discarded pair of pyjama pants and slipping them on. He steadied himself against Sparky's broad back as he did so, wondering if it was worth looking for his slippers, or even a pair of socks. Based on the dog's reaction, it didn't seem like he had the time.

He unlatched the bedroom door - apparently Sparky had solved the mystery of the doorknob, which was something else to worry about, should he survive the current crisis - and stepped back as three hundred pounds of coal-black Devil Dog slipped past him into the hall.

He followed the anxious pup down the narrow corridor towards the living room, where flickering lights pulsed against the dirty walls and excited voices conversed in hushed whispers. The television was on, displaying the familiar green-on-green background of the Eerie-tron. On the worn sofa, faces washed pale in the inconstant illumination coming from Corn Critters: The Movie: The Game, were Dash and Simon.

They looked up as he entered, eyes hollow, expressions guilty.

"It's four am," said Marshall. "On a Tuesday. And that games console should be in the Evidence Foot Locker, not plugged in and spewing cursed pixels all over the lounge."

(Sadly, their small rented apartment was not big enough to fit in a dedicated Secret Spot, or even the free-standing cabinet that had once held their evidence. The foot locker was cheap, locked easily, and doubled as a coffee-table)

They looked at him. They looked at Sparky.

"I can't believe your dog ratted us out," said Dash.

"Bad Sparky," said Simon. "Very bad."

"Very good Sparky," said Marshall, crossing the room and unplugging the power cord as the Corn Mother on their television whispered promises of arcane delights in his ear. "Excellent Sparky, who came and got me before you two idiots had your life-force sucked out through your eyes."

Sparky nodded with all three of his heads.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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[personal profile] froodle
The sidewalk-hags were gathering, clotting the pavements and forcing pedestrians to walk in the gutters and on the roads to avoid them.

"Excuse me," said Simon politely. They ignored him. The vast black Hellhound who walked at his side barked, the tone sharp and reproving. The hags did not move.

Marshall put two fingers to his mouth and whistled. The hags looked up, then moved a little way apart, blocking even more of the walkway. He looked at his companions, his hands raised in helpless exasperation.

Dash sneezed. It was loud and obviously fake, but it worked. The hags fled.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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evilinsanemonkey: Marshall Teller and Dash X from Eerie Indiana making eyes at each other (Eerie: Dash/Mars)
[personal profile] evilinsanemonkey
The Obligatory Coffee Shop AU (Because Every Fandom Has One) (4105 words) by flashforeward
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Eerie Indiana
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Simon Holmes, Marshall Teller, Dash X (Eerie Indiana)
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Mega Voodoo Eerie Weirdness
Summary:

Simon Holmes has lived a relatively normal life in Eerie, Indiana - as normal a life as you can live in Eerie - and now runs a coffee shop, Trusted Associates, which he owns with his childhood best friend Marshall. One day a new customer turns their lives upside down and Simon’s the only one who seems to realize exactly what’s going on.

froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
Someone had turned the Cloud Sheep out to graze in the lowest field. Tethered to small cold iron weights that kept them from floating away, they drifted back and forth, pausing to nibble at the flowering helium deposits that sprouted here and there amongst the long grass.

Farmer Chambers was waiting by the back gate when Simon arrived. His sheepdog, a black and white border collie named, as all such dogs are named, Jessie, bounded over to Sparky and began an excitable monologue conducted half in Canid, and half in Latin. Simon listened just long enough to make sure she wasn't trying to recruit his pet Hellhound for the Canine Liberation Front, then left them to it.

"Morning, Ephraim," he said, giving a little wave. "I'm here to do the six-month check up for the herd. You set up the appointment with my assistant, Sheila?"

The old man nodded, thumbs hooked into the straps of his faded blue overalls.

"Aye," he said, opening the gate and gesturing for Simon to go ahead. "They're looking well. Should be a good balloon harvest this year."

Simon started down the muddy path worn through the rich green.

"No vulcanisation issues with the rubber?" he asked. "I brought Sparky along, just in case we needed a little Hellfire and sulphur."

He patted his breast pocket, where a flute carved from a hanged man's rib jutted at an odd angle. There were faster ways to bring a Hellhound to heel, but the music of the dead almost always meant they came willingly.

Ephraim shook his head.

"Lambs are coagulating nicely," he said. "Helium blossom keeps the ewes plump, which keeps clown predation down. I figure a round sheep don't make such a good basis for a balloon animal."

"Also they can fly off," agreed Simon.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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Ongoing Verse: Holmes Brothers

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froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

This week, here's a sketch of Hysanthrepups made by IzzyDoodles:

froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
After the rain, the world was outlined in silver. Fat droplets of water clung to the edges of leaves, threatening to spill over. The rough edges of the curb were rendered smooth and glossy beneath the sheen of damp, and the grass glistened as every blade bent beneath it's liquid burden.

Sparky took one step away from the shelter of the overhanging porch, and then another. The sodden earth gave beneath his feet and wisps of steam hissed and spiralled around him as he walked.

The Hellhound barked, a deep, booming expression of pure joy, and bounded into the garden.

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
I've no new crafts of my own to share this year, so instead, I thought I'd spotlight some of the awesome craftworks the talented people in this fandom have created.

Here's a crochet Sparky plush by PixelKei:

IMG_20200105_144708_kindlephoto-1091524624.jpg

IMG_20200105_144653_kindlephoto-1091564301.jpg

Read more of the Microwave-verse here )
froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

As it's Halloween, how about a cuddle pile of three-headed doggos to curl up with while you watch Hocus Pocus?







Sparky (black crochet, blue and red eyes) by PixelKei.

Sprite (altered beanie baby, all black) by Erik237.

Gonzales (light brown, fleece) by CholyKnight.

Hodge (altered Build-a-Bear, rottweiler) by Jewel of the Nerd.

Doug (altered beanie baby, chihuahua/black lab/bull terrier) by AwwfulAdoptables.

HenchBean (crochet dalmation, blue eyes, disapproving face) by SeaKnightsCraft.

Hysanthrepups (slate grey wool, green snake tail, red eyes) by IzzyDoodles.

Mrs. Fluffins (altered plush, pink poodle and foxy face) by CaveZone.

Ulythrees (altered plush, yellow central head) by CaveZone.
froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

This week, take a look at this amazing three-headed plush boy from KillStar:

froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

This week, check out this awesome Sparky moodboard made for me by friendofdorothy!
froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

Here's the original Sparky plush, knitted by PixelKei, about to earn himself a smack from Spike the Manticore, made by AwwfulAdoptables:



Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

This week, here's Hodge, Sparky, Gonzales and Sprite spending some time together:

IMG_20190607_115925_hdr_kindlephoto-302889656.jpg

IMG_20190607_115913_hdr_kindlephoto-303074010.jpg
froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
It's Thursday, the day we dedicate to Simon's absolute best boy, Sparky the Hellhound.

This week, a fully shaded portrait of Sparky vs Manticore by Kari L. Korthals:

wGrn_JgI.jpg

Ongoing Verse: Microwave

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