To whom it may concern

If Eerie had a coat of arms, what do you reckon it would look like?

I think it would have a jackalope and a bigfoot (with pink hairbow) rampant on either side of the shield, maybe two crossed ears of corn over the top and the motto would be a Latin translation of something along the lines of "statistically the most normal place in the country." Or, "peaceful, average, normal". I don't know if you can have a Latin version of "all-American".

The shield itself would be divided into quarters and the images would be Elvis, a dairy cow (but a terrifying one, like the poo-brained horse or that fucking deer with the hands from Adventure Time), a tornado and the tags that say "Lost" on them from Bureau of Lost.

And bigfoot and the jackalope would have, respectively, a plus and a minus on their flanks, where MLP have their cutie marks.