Eerie, Indiana fanfiction: Art Lovers

[froodle]

If Marshall had ever stopped to think about it, he might have wondered why a small isolated farming community like Eerie should need an entire streets-worth of boarding houses. They lined both sides of the long road that divided the northern end of town, their paint peeling, their windows grimy and streaked with years of rainfall, the balustrades of their top-floor balconies crumbling and overgrown with weeds. Hand-written vacancy signs, faded and yellow with age, stood in the glass panes of the warped wooden doors.

Marshall had never seen anyone check in to any of them, although from time to time he'd watched Radford replenish the World o' Stuff's small display of informational leaflets detailing places to visit, eat and spend the night in Eerie. Now, as the truck emblazoned with the asymmetric yet aesthetically pleasing logo of Eerie Salvage, Towing and Sculpture pulled away from the curb, hauling the wood-panelled station wagon behind it, he eyed the drab terrace suspiciously.

Sergeant Knight was recording something in his notebook, his pen moving mechanically across the page, his letters uniform in height and thickness. Inside the police car, Officer Derek was talking animatedly into a hand-held radio, his free arm waving as expansively as the cramped space would allow. That didn't mean much, of course; Simon and Mars had once seen Derek practically do semaphore when the vending machine at the Eeriemat ran out of Kornade Kwench, a drink identical to Cornade in every way except for the spelling and the number of exclamation points used in the adverts.

Marshall crossed the street to where the police sergeant stood. He had just drawn breath to speak when Knight looked up, his expression unreadable behind his mirrored shades.

"Yes," he said, his voice devoid of any inflection.

"Uh," said Marshall, his throat suddenly dry. He coughed, as much to buy himself a moment as to clear his throat. "I was just wondering... what was with the tow truck? Where are the people who owned it? Was there a traffic accident? I don't see any milk on the grou-"

"It was donated to the Eerie Arts Foundation by anonymous art lovers," said Sergeant Knight, speaking as if by rote. "The Mayor and the City Council thank them for their civic-minded sacrifice."

"Oh," said Marshall.

Suddenly there was a rectangle of pasteboard in Knight's outstretched hand. Marshall took it with the very tips of his forefinger and thumb, holding it away from his body as though it might explode. It had only happened once, but it was enough to make a guy wary.

"Performance piece and hog roast at the Eerie Municipal Dump tonight," said the Sergeant. "Free entry if you fill out your Art Donors card."

He spun on his heel and marched away towards the squad car, which pulled away from the curb in a flurry of squealing brakes and waving antennae.

Marshall looked down at the card, and reached for the walkie talkie at his belt.

"Simon?" he said. "Come in, Simon. I need you to get to my house and see if Syndi will lend us two berets and a couple of stripy tops for the night."





Trusted Associates, Inc.

Halloween by froodle, in which Mars and Simon celebrate a Von Orloff-free All Hallows Eve

Surprise by froodle, in which Mars tries to make sure Simon's birthday goes a little better this year

The Glade by froodle, in which Simon and Mars visit a place that only exists on February 29th

Egg Hunt by froodle, in which Simon and Mars partake of some traditional Easter activities

Boardwalk by froodle, in which Simon and Mars are swayed by radio advertising

Lady in Red by froodle, in which Simon experiments on the old-fashioned radio in the Secret Spot, and horror ensues

Waiting In by froodle, in which there is an ice-storm and a handyman does not arrive

Seafoam by froodle, in which Simon and Marshall go to the seaside

A Night at the Circus by froodle, in which a carnivale comes to town, and Marshall and Simon do not enjoy themselves

Taking a Break by froodle, in which Simon and Marshall enjoy some much-needed R&R

Model Railway by froodle, in which a new business prepares to open in Eerie

Shoreline by froodle, in which Simon and Marshall investigate strange happenings on the shores of Lake Eerie

Parade by froodle, in which Mars takes issue with the Eerie Beekeepers Association's choice of mascot

Homestead by froodle, in which Marshall finally gets something useful out of shop class

Hound by froodle, in which Simon makes a friend

Errands by froodle, in which Simon has a to-do list

Slyboots by froodle, in which a certain corporal of the infernal regions comes to Eerie. Crossover with Johannes Cabal the Necromancer.

Waterlogged by froodle, in which Eerie experiences heavy rainfall

Festival by froodle, in which Eerie's local businesses celebrate the summer

Strawberry by froodle, in which there is unauthorised hubbub in Eerie

Wildlife by froodle, in which Simon and Marshall go to the beach

Facilities by froodle, in which the Eerie Bus Station and Supper Club has a problem with the men's toilet

Anticipation by froodle, in which Simon and Harley look forward to the Equinox

Castle by froodle, in which there is unexpected architecture in Eerie

Visitor in which Marshall's grandma comes to stay

Euclid by froodle, in which Marshall and Simon investigate strange events at the Eerie Cemetery

The Hut by froodle, in which Simon takes on the forces of Eerie solo

Comments

[deifire]

Love it! I think this line is my one of my all-time favorites:

...Simon and Mars had once seen Derek practically do semaphore when the vending machine at the Eeriemat ran out of Kornade Kwench, a drink identical to Cornade in every way except for the spelling and the number of exclamation points used in the adverts.

[froodle]

oh nineties advertising, did you ever meet a cool mispelling and excessive punctuation you didnt like?

[eviinsanemonkey.livejournal.com]

this is glorious

also sometimes i wonder if sergeant knight is operated by remote control

ALSO why does "Art Donor Card" sound suspiciously like "Organ Donor Card"? :P

[froodle]

ALSO why does "Art Donor Card" sound suspiciously like "Organ Donor Card"? :P

well, its certainly not because we'll pull out your kidneys to mount in a found art exhibit....